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Mfonobong Inyang: Valentine: Love Doesn’t Price a Factor or Does It?


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In case you haven’t but watched the 2003 traditional, Love Doesn’t Price A Factor starring my favs, Nick Cannon and Christina Milan, I dare say your adolescence isn’t full. It’s a narrative of how a younger nerd paid a preferred cheerleader in highschool so far him with the hope that his ‘cred’ amongst his schoolmates will get a lift. Ultimately, they each ended up catching emotions.

The film, to a sure extent, mirrors the dynamics of most romantic relationships – as a rule, there’s a social, financial, tutorial, ethnic or worldview hole between each people they usually normally do essentially the most to bridge it.

Love is within the air. Cupid is on the prowl with its quiver filled with amorous arrows. Lovers could have their hearts pierced by means of however the precise bleeding may occur of their pockets. It’s Valentine and for some motive, I get these dejavu moments – it jogs my memory of Detty December the place individuals spared no expense to indulge themselves. We are able to safely say that these two celebrations are in the identical WhatsApp group as a result of, simply as there have been financial implications for Detty December, we can even have for Valentine.

However the query is: how a lot is an excessive amount of? That’s the actual elephant within the room. Don’t get it twisted, I’m all for love; my earliest writings had been dominated by love poems. The truth is, my first revealed e-book – about 10 years in the past – was an anthology on love poems. So in case you name me a hopeless romantic, you wouldn’t be incorrect – that’s how a lot I like love. Nevertheless, as I get older (and hopefully wiser), I began creating a robust sense of monetary duty.


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It’s at all times nice to deal with your important different to a memorable expertise on Valentine, so long as it doesn’t wreck your pocket. I’m no connoisseur in issues like these however let me share with you easy hacks that I’ve utilized personally:

Dishonest Is Extra Costly!

I don’t understand how individuals who have a number of lovers do it however they’re the true MVPs. Courting or being married to somebody is a substantial amount of dedication in itself and many individuals genuinely battle to maintain up with the monetary calls for. Now think about having a number of companions. Dishonest isn’t solely morally reprehensible but additionally financially irresponsible. Funding a number of relationships is a pathway to penury and the ethical chapter will inevitably result in monetary chapter ultimately. Belief me, loyalty to that your important different is a serious key alert.

You Mustn’t Go On A Date!

Throughout Valentine, there’s a sure phobia of being alone. So we see a panoply of desperado strikes to hook up with somebody simply in time for Valentine. Individuals who ordinarily wouldn’t share the identical area discover themselves in ‘situationships’, simply to allow them to tick the field of being with bae or boo throughout the interval. Not solely do you expose your self to the emotional hazards of an emergency romance, however you additionally spend greater than it’s best to since you’re making an attempt to show one thing that basically isn’t there within the first place. Such romance normally fizzles out after the cash does as a result of it’s based mostly on a quid professional quo precept. Shout out to crew “No Romance with out Finance Geng” lol.

True Friendship Issa Aim!

I put a premium on real friendships. The operative phrase is “real”. It’s because mutual respect ought to come earlier than mutual advantages. In essence, friendship is the infrastructure upon which any sort of relationship is constructed – whether or not romantic, enterprise, social, and so forth. One of many lovely issues about buddies is that while the world judges you on what you probably did, they minimize you some slack and decide you by what you supposed.

For instance, in case you get your pal a present or take her or him to the flicks/dinner, that individual will see past the financial worth of that have and admire the intentionality and thoughtfulness behind it. After all, this isn’t an alibi for being stingy in case you can afford a lavish present. It simply implies that you want this sort of wholesome relationship the place the KPI isn’t how a lot you spent or didn’t spend.

Social Media Isn’t the SI Unit

It’s a crowd mentality to attempt to sustain with individuals whose life are exaggerated on social media. Lots of people need to do what they noticed on the gram, regardless that they’ll’t afford it. A few of these individuals actually have the cash to throw round however sadly, the overwhelming majority simply put up a smokescreen – the extra motive why your life shouldn’t be managed by the content material you see in your telephone or tv screens. There’s a smaller model of each massive factor. An African proverb says: “in case you can’t get an eagle within the air, get a hen on the land – as a result of they each have wings.” Make plans that you’re comfy with, work onerous and bid your time – someday, it is possible for you to to purchase her or him the world. Bear in mind the grass isn’t at all times greener on the opposite aspect, it’s greener the place it’s watered.

Transfer It Ahead

Identical to I mentioned earlier, there are financial implications for Valentine. Companies will naturally weaponize this market intelligence, so don’t be shocked in case you see issues getting costlier than regular. In every single place can even be swamped with lovers making an attempt to get their slice of the motion. If all that’s an excessive amount of for you, you’ll be able to at all times transfer your date ahead to when issues are a lot quieter. Do what is sweet for you and yours. Nothing needs to be set in stone. Love needs to be the one fixed – every part else can shift.

Past all these deliberate actions, the significance of really loving your important different shouldn’t be misplaced on you. Having some emotional intelligence will help you establish the opposite individual’s love language which, in flip, helps you calibrate your plans to middle on that. Some individuals might relish phrases of affirmation, receiving presents, high quality time, acts of service or bodily contact. I guess you already know this one, haha.

Fam, belief me, it’s not that deep. You see this life, you’ll be able to’t come and kill your self! Sincerely do essentially the most you’ll be able to with the hopes that your important different (hopefully not others) will admire it and, on the very least, provide you with an A for effort.

I hope with these few factors of mine, I’ve been capable of persuade you and never confuse you on the subject that claims: “Love Doesn’t Price A Factor!”

Completely satisfied Valentine everybody❤!


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