The day Ita moved to Abuja to stay along with his girlfriend, Ekanem, was the day ladies and women picketed the Nigerian Authorities. It was the identical day he first referred to as himself a feminist. It was additionally the day I turned certain my good friend was beside himself.
When you requested me why Ita loves Ekanem, I wouldn’t have the ability to inform you. And I’m his greatest good friend. He calls me Koko-Obong. We’re inseparable. Nonetheless, for those who requested me to inform you how Ita and Ekanem turned lovers, how Ita selected to not see her simply as a woman he met at a bar, consuming and roasting her lungs with the most important cigar I had ever seen in my life, I wouldn’t have the ability to inform you.
Ita himself wouldn’t have the ability to inform you. His causes are at all times altering. Generally, he says it’s due to the way in which she squares her shoulder and walks self-assuredly. Different occasions, he says it’s due to how nice she treats him, how nice she feels about herself. In truth, as soon as whereas we had been at a gents’s house, having gents’s enjoyable, Ita excluded himself.
When somebody requested why he excluded himself from one thing that wasn’t clearly mistaken, another person stated, “As a result of he loves his girlfriend greater than you’re keen on your girlfriend.” Then that somebody turned to him and requested what it’s about Ekanem that made a “hermit” out of him, and Ita stated, “Have you ever heard my Ekanem sing? I swear to God, you’ll fall in love”.
That was the day my worry started. Later, once I tried to analyze what love may make a skittish fellow calm and deep. He instructed me, “Isn’t the truth that I’m glad a adequate motive?”
So I ended asking questions and pretended to be glad for my good friend. Even when he instructed me he was shifting to Abuja to stay with Ekanem.
Nonetheless, I did what a good friend ought to do. I referred to as my good friend apart and requested if he’d thought of it nicely sufficient. He stated he had. I requested him if he was feeling okay. He stated he was. I requested him if he had been having sure sorts of goals. He instructed me no.
There was this church campaign they had been promoting each two minutes on radio and TV. I satisfied him to go together with me. Not that I wished to go. I simply wished to take my good friend there, in case of incasity. We went. Throughout a prayer session, I overheard my good friend praying to God to destroy every thing that tries to face in opposition to his transfer to, and subsequent prosperity in, Abuja.
I used to be weak and offended. Is that what I left my mattress for?
On the day of his journey, I drove him to the airport. His mother and father and siblings stated there was extra to it. I instructed them I assumed so too, though I searched in all places and couldn’t discover another backstory besides the one Ita instructed me: That they had been in love with one another. That Ekanem had a thriving and really promising profession in Abuja, so though he wasn’t notably complaining about his job or life in Lagos, he determined to maneuver to her metropolis so he may see her extra, “marry her if she would marry him,” and develop outdated collectively together with her.
That was all I discovered. It was unbelievable! Nobody ought to imagine that the one motive a person uprooted himself from the place he had managed to determine himself was that he wished to be along with his girlfriend. And the man wasn’t even bothered about what everybody thought. He was too enthusiastic about their life collectively to even concentrate. Me, I used to be drained. The one factor I owed him was a drive to the airport. I did that as an excellent good friend.
Ita obtained to Abuja the identical day ladies and women in Nigeria did probably the most surprising factor I had ever seen or heard in my entire life.
Nobody is aware of how they obtained there, or how their arrival was coordinated. Nobody can inform when the plan was made and the way it wasn’t leaked. There was no identified convener amongst them. Abuja simply woke as much as see numerous buttocks sitting round Round Street.
They weren’t celebrities or faces you’d see within the media. They had been ladies of all sizes and strengths. These ladies sat down like mbiam in our capital metropolis, bewailing their plight, saying they’ve lived all their lives as endangered species. And when information about their motion broke, individuals’s moms, aunties, sisters and daughters went to affix them. Market ladies left their stalls. Feminine lecturers marched out of their school rooms. Feminine civil servants filed out. Females from the non-public sector joined them; besides feminine bankers who stood transfixed of their cubicles. It was the approaching of ladies in uniform that gave everybody goose bumps.
These ladies sat crying, singing dirges, performing theatrics that made the federal government look unhealthy.
I watched all of it on CNN. The media had a subject day. Then one thing occurred. A bomb was set off, a brief distance from the place the ladies sat. Folks say it was the federal government who set off that bomb of their workplace advanced to disintegrate that gathering. I don’t know whether it is true, however it labored. The ladies, all a million of them, ran for pricey life.
It was throughout that commotion that CNN’s birds-eye caught Ita operating, defending Ekanem, as they discovered their strategy to security.
I didn’t know find out how to really feel once I noticed him. My good friend Ita was the one man in that crowd of protesting ladies. As he scampered to security, he was nonetheless waving a placard that learn, “Your cruelty is displaying. Cross the gender and equal alternative invoice.”
I sat on the fringe of my seat watching this man make an undesirable specimen out of himself: A person born of a lion behaving like Bingo.
In that break up second, the information took one other angle; issues turned about Ita’bong: the one Nigerian man who cares about ladies. They made a hero out of him. Speaking about how Nigerian males don’t help Nigerian ladies. How we lord it over our ladies, mistreating them and refusing them seats on the desk. They talked about how our authorities is simply a mirrored image of us.
I sat and watched them make this boy appear like he wasn’t fathered by a Nigerian man. Once they later interviewed him, he stated he was part of it as a result of he had the first-hand expertise of how laborious it’s to be a Nigerian girl.
Inform me the first-hand expertise that Ita’bong has. Was it not his bearded mom’s each day wahala that drove his father to an early grave?
Anyway, days after the occasion, I visited Abuja for work. I stayed over with them and requested him about that assertion.
Ita requested me if I had ever seen a girl crushed and mangled by a person? Or a girl/woman/toddler raped by a person. He requested me if I had ever seen a girl handed over a promotion in favour of a much less appropriate man. He questioned me if I had ever seen or heard a couple of widow whose home and properties had been snatched from her, by her in-laws, after her husband’s demise. Ita requested me to inform him if I had ever heard it stated man doesn’t have youngsters till he has a male little one.
Me, I instructed him that males don’t simply stand up and beat ladies o. That me I’ve by no means raped anyone. I instructed him that the place I come from, we don’t steal from widows and the place it’s executed, there is no such thing as a smoke with out fireplace. I instructed him that individuals say a person doesn’t have youngsters but till he has a male little one as a result of a feminine little one shouldn’t communicate with a loud voice. Furthermore, who will permit her to take a seat on the desk the place selections are made?
Once I stated that, my good friend checked out me as if he was anticipating me to determine one thing from my assertion. Then he stated it was his flip to cook dinner dinner; we should always go and proceed within the kitchen. I checked out his head very nicely, then instructed him I wanted to ship a report back to Lagos and excused myself.
Later, that night, as we lounged within the sitting room, I saved Ekanem questioning what it was about her that had made my good friend mad.
Was it within the mound of her ass or that of her breast? It definitely wasn’t her character, as a result of she didn’t deal with him like a person.
Now I instructed you all of that to inform you this, “I’m not my good friend Ita’bong. My father was a lion. So was his father and his father’s father. If Ita’bong’s father didn’t take him, mine took me to completely different gatherings of males! I do know who a person is. Look right here, I’m the one with the penis. Not you!”
Picture Credit score: Dreamstime
About Roseline Nya
My title is Roseline Nya. Story-telling is deeply ingrained in my cells and, actually, drips out of my pores.